I love fennel. LOVE it, adore that aniseed vibe, but we do like it finely sliced. I used my mandolin. This was half necessity because it delivers beautifully uniform, thinnest of thin slices and it was half therapy.

A few months ago, I nearly lost my thumb to a mandolin. Well, when I say I nearly lost my thumb, what I mean is that Ian had to administer first aid – and it involved steristrips. He lectured me as well, but huh. Whatever.

So eventually the flap of necrotic thumb flesh sorted itself out (too graphic for a cooking blog? Be brave), but the emotional scars remained. Be cautious dear friend as you brandish your mandolin. It has no brain and will not swerve to one side when you offer it a digit. PTSD (post-traumatic sore digit) is no laughing matter. The last thing you need when operating a mandolin is shaky hands.

Nice recipe though – put all thoughts of repulsive injury from your mind and have a look.

Here’s the pretty fennel bulb… with the souless mandolin impassively sat behind it

And here’s the big lump of leftover ham I acquired from Mum and Dad (score!!)

In a saute pan, heat a splash of oil and a knob of butter. Add 1 chopped onion and gently saute until softened and lightly coloured – about 5 mins.

Add 1 very finely sliced fennel and cook for another 5 mins.

Add some leftover roasted ham (that you acquired from your parents), chopped into chunks (the ham – not your parents) and a tin of cannelini beans that you have rinsed and cook until heated through – another 5-10 mins.

Put some Rigatoni pasta on to cook until al dente.

Pour over a small tub (1/4 pint) of single cream and a nice handful of grated parmesan and combine. Check seasoning – add salt and black pepper if desired.

Drain the pasta and fold it into the mixture.

Once the cream has heated and the cheese melted to cover the ingredients, serve with a scattering of chopped parsley. Grate more parmesan over the top if you like… yum.

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1 onion, finely chopped
1 fennel bulb, finely sliced (use a mandoline if you have one)
450g cooked ham, chopped into small chunks
1 tin Cannelini beans
75g per person Rigatoni (or other pasta tubes)
small tub single cream
handful of shredded parmesan
salt and black pepper
chopped parsley (optional)

In a saute pan, heat a splash of oil and a knob of butter.
Add the onion and fennel and gently saute until softened and lightly coloured – about 10 mins. Put the pasta on to cook until al dente.
Add the ham and beans and cook until heated through – another 5-10 mins.

Pour over the cream and parmesan and combine. Check seasoning – add salt and black pepper if desired.
Drain the pasta and fold it into the mixture.

Once the cream has heated and the cheese melted to cover the ingredients, serve with a scattering of chopped parsley.